Preschool Fever
Posted on September 3rd, 2007 – 9:27 PMBy May Chen
Sometime last spring, my husband and I were seized by a kind of madness. We polled friends, made numerous site visits and created complicated spreadsheets.
Yes, it was time to choose a preschool for Zoe.
Where does one start? Montessori or The Creative Curriculum? Church basement or free-standing? School lunch or packed lunch? Summer vacation or no summer vacation? Pick-up times, drop-off times, weekly rates, monthly rates…my husband diligently entered all information into a massive spreadsheet.
Not that any of that helped us. When it came down to it, it was what we felt in our gut rather than hard numbers that swayed us. One school seemed too industrial, with its grey brick walls. At another, the kids seemed too wild. The metal cribs where babies napped at another school reminded me of a Romanian orphanage. And then there were the killer high-heeled black boots worn by one principal. I wondered: would she be more concerned about fashion or my child’s wellbeing??
At one point, my husband and I both fell in love with the idea of sending Zoe to Lake Country School. Friends whose kids go/went there spoke of it with the zeal of missionaries. We walked into the gracious red brick building, saw sunlight streaming in tall French windows, sat for a morning’s observation during which the children served us tea (chamomile, darjeeling or green?), watched a video on Maria Montessori and of kids gardening at their summer Land School, and were completely won over.
But wait. Did that mean we would become - gasp - private school people? Were we setting ourselves up for a lifetime of annual fees that rivaled that of a private college? (As one friend put it: You can pay for this every year, then pay for college. Or you can just pay for college.)
We agonized for weeks. We filled out application forms detailing our goals for the nurturing of our child’s brain, body and soul. We even took Zoe to the Lake Country audition. Well, they called it a playdate. A few weeks later, she got an offer in the mail. Our girl got an offer! A sign, of course, that she was on the right path to Harvard.
There were many reasons not to do it - a temporary single-family income, the uncertainty in the newspaper industry (would I still have a job in a few months?) and the fact that Lake Country didn’t take anyone under three and we’d have to find somewhere else for the baby’s daycare. In the end, it was my mother-in-law who brought us down to earth. Now imagine, she said. You’ve got a meeting to rush to. It’s winter. You have to drop Zoe, then take Maya somewhere else. Do you really need the stress?
But it’s My Child’s Education.
It’s Preschool.
It’s Feeding her Brain.
It’s Preschool.
In the end, we decided on another Montessori-based preschool and daycare, closer to home and where the two girls will be in rooms next to each other. It’s a little cheaper too, though not much. Friends have raved about it and we like the teachers.
The girls start this week. The madness has lifted. Until first grade.
18 Responses to "Preschool Fever"
Searching for a new school or daycare can certainly be a tedious experience. I hope that your girls enjoy their new school and that you are pleased with your decision. I think as parents we just really need to remember that we must select the place that is right for our children, not because of what others say or even the numbers. That gut feeling is really the most important part of the decision for me. I never thought about myself as a “private school person” until I started teaching at one. Now, despite the fact that I have the utmost respect for public schools, my children will be going the private route. It isn’t that I want them to get into Harvard or Yale, it is that I want them to feel more like a person then a number. The class sizes in my area our out of control due to budget limitations. And although I know that having my student not attend the school will only cause the school to lose money I also cannot see putting my student in a disadvantage just because I wish to support the public schools. I will never say no to a levy vote because I know that the current school funding system has left schools in a dire situation. But I will make my decisions about where to send my children to school based on what is best for them and a smaller class is better. Regarding the cost, I think that we make choices and if paying more for education is a priority we will make it work. At the school I am at many of the students come from hard working class families who sacrifice the extras to make sure their students have a good education. They are not all rich kids like one might typically figure. In the end, we must make the choice best for us and our family and go with it. Best of luck to the new adjustment.
The search for a preschool/daycare is time consuming. We started in January to make the change this September. I agree with Christina, it has to be a child/family fit. So many choices, but it all boils down to “it’s preschool” and what does my child really need. Hopefully, my daughter will not only survive, but flourish in the preschool we picked - mostly because of our gut reaction.
We, too agonized over the initial preschool decision, and had to go through the process all over again when we moved. We’re also a family that has two very different kinds of kids with two very different kinds of educational and developmental needs, so we’ve had to accept the complication of dual locations.
What I’m realizing is that it’s only the beginning. With so many choices even for public schools these days (magnet? charter? language immersion? open enrollment? neighborhood versus test scores), it’s mind-boggling.
I know I’m biased, but I think you (and your lovely daughters) will really enjoy their new school. You’ll have a great time seeing how the world really starts to expand for them in that environment.
I loved the line “it’s preschool.” Precisely. No need to stress. Go somewhere that feels right and it will be. And, if not, switch. And, yes, parental convenience and price are definitely important factors!
My daughter also just started at a Montesorri pre-school in our neighborhood. I looked at a few–our options are limited by the fact that we need all-day care–and picked the one that I liked the feel of best even though I have only the foggiest idea of what a Montesorri education is.
But I didn’t miss something, did I? There’s no public pre-school option, is there?
I share Julie’s choice-confusion. Like a lot of moms and dads that grew up in the 70’s my husband and I are still disoriented by how different the school scene is than when we were kids and there were basically two choices in our Midwestern towns–the neighborhood school and the Catholic school.
On our one block in St. Paul there are 6 schools represented: two public schools (one magnet–whatever that is), two different Catholic schools and the Waldorf school.
My astute neighbor said something a while ago that’s stuck with me. She said that she thinks discussing school choice has replaced money and religion as the dicey topics to talk to your neighbors about. I know we all pussy foot around it around here although one brave (nosey?) neighbor did once ask another neighbor how she reconciled her progressive politics with sending her kids to private school. She also said her grown son still resents the fact that she sent him to public school. It’s always complicated.
I’ve promised myself I’m going to wade into learning about our elementary school choices this year (2 years early!). I’m also going to try and figure out how to talk about them comfortably with others.
Sherry, you are so right. Instead of what’s best for your kid, school choice seems is what it says about YOU as parents….and the more choices, the harder. One co-worker told me how she lives very simply and drives and old car, all so she could send her daughters to private school. She made me feel perfectly awful about not doing the same. Then I found out her husband was a corporate lawyer.
This is off-topic May, but one of my good friends is Maria Montessori’s great-granddaughter. (She is older than me and you).
Congrats on your decision.
Wow. What’s she like?
Sherry,
Some districts do offer preschool that is aligned with the district curriuculm. I live in Bloomington, and they have 2 different options for parents to choose from. I do have to say, however, that once I looked at there curr. and compared it with Kindercare (where our son goes), we don’t see a difference. Preschool is preschool, as long as there is a set curriculum MOST will be just fine. I work in St. Paul, and would be happy to fill you in on some of the schools near you; there is a wide variety of good schools in St. Paul, don’t let the recent test scores fool you (but that is a whole nother topic!).
wow, you guys sure did work hard searching high and low for the most perfect school for your children. I just picked the preschool closest to my home after confirming it had a decent classroom with lots of project stations and nice, friendly teachers. I must be setting my kids up to be total underachievers.
Many district ecfe programs go through preschool….
Just wait until you are faced with choosing an elementary program!:) Three kids and have tried, large church preschool, small church preschool and small private montessori (did I spell that correctly - wish there was a spell check here) Each had had their own advantages… As for elementary choice, we eneded up open enrolling although the district we are in is highly regarded. Just to forewarn you we put as much if more energy into choosing a public school as we did fiding a preschool. With open enrollment not only do you have a choice over district but also individual schools within the chosen district. Add in immersion programs and the choice is somewhat overwhelming. Today was our first kindergarten day and it went great! Can’t believe we have a school aged child… Parenting - Long days, short years..
Oh, one more comment, we too felt the pull of private schools. But my husband always came back to 30,000 to 60,000 a YEAR (three kids) would justify a move to even the most expensive school district in the state… We’re pretty sensible with our money and well it is hard to justify with so many wonderful public and charter options out there.
I agree with Sherry…I feel so overwhelmed by the school-choice stuff! I’m not usually one to talk about “the good ol’ days,” but it really did seem simpler when I was a kid…you just went to your neighborhood school and you were done with it!
I love the idea of having my kids do that too, because I want them to go to school with the same kids who are our neighbors…give them a stronger sense of community.
BUT you also want to make the best choice and make sure they get what they need…and that YOU as the parent also feel comfortable with the school’s culture, etc.
I find it stressful to think about it all! I’ve got a couple more years to sort it out…but I guess I’m not even sure where to begin!
I would suggest really looking around. For us we went “out of distrcit” to go to a closer school! So we did go with the neighborhood concept in a way. Yet the majority of kids in our neighborhood attend different private anways. Maybe in the end that will make the kids get along better as they get older. Kind of nice to come home and be free of the labels etc that get put on kids in school.
We started by calling the districts. I was impressed that all three principals were so gracious with their time! (I just wonder if it has become an extra burden on the alrady busy principals to lead these “tours”)
We moved to Minnesota two years ago, just as we were starting into the whole “school” dilemma. I feel so lucky to have found the Montessori school we have found…but it took some digging. Especially for smaller non-profit schools, advertising is crazy expensive and there is no comprehensive listing of schools that exists currently. I think the Star Trib would be doing the community a great service to publish once a year a complete (or as complete as it can get) resource of all the preschools out there, and a tutorial on all the different kinds out there (e.g., montessori vs,. more traditional play-based methods). I would also like to see a discussion regarding those schools that have chosen to remain a school as opposed to serving as daycare as well. More and more, this is a rarity with double-income families, but it was one of our criterion (i.e., we wanted just a school with no extended care option).
Also, there is more and more research out there supporting the value of early education. I know that Montessori folks believe this, it would be nice to see a piece on this in the Star Trib as well. So much to talk about!
Excellent suggestion, Cara. I’ll pass it on to the editors at the paper.
Cara–
That is a fantastic idea about a comprehensive listing of pre-schools in the Strib. They do it for camps in the spring! This would be a really useful service.
Also, just out of curiosity…why did you want a school that did not have an extended-care option?
–Katy
Hi, I was unreasonably excited about my daughter starting preschool. I felt like I was going to start preschool too. I think I liked it as a kid. (I went to Montessori, but didn’t pick one for Caroline.) So I toured some of the usual suspects and picked Dodge, even though it was a bit of a haul. I picked it because of feel. absolutely. It’s so comfy and nice I want to live there. I want to go to Dodge. I plan to lurk around in the parent lounge and I hope to make friends with the interesting looking parents there. I’m noticing that I’m being shy so far though. And…it’s a fit with Caroline. I’m a little worried that she won’t learning anything except about pond flora and bugs, but…I’m going to take the chance for now.
