It’s time to  follow-up on my “Where Art Thou Mrs. Doubtfire?” searching for new day care trials and tribulations. 

Our current day care provider has taken a new job and closing up shop. We have been searching and searching for a new place that we felt comfortable sending our kids to part time.

I’m happy to report back with success! After many inquiries, phone calls, reference checks,  and face-to-face interviews we have found our new provider. (Thanks in part to the parents of Ben’s best 2 year old gal pal who also attends his current day care).

They found her first and she just happened to have PT openings for a baby and a 2 year old. Hallelujah! Plus she was a matter of blocks away from our current provider. Of course, we didn’t want to do this hastily. But we also know that transitioning his environment is hard for a little guy and thought it would ease the change if he had a familiar friend there too.

Our potential provider had us over to observe her day care over two visits. We were impressed with her play-based learning, her nurturing  manner and emphasis on a safe and loving environment. The  children attending seemed to be thriving and enjoying themselves. They even sang a song while they cleaned up their toy area.  I called and interviewed several other parents who have been going to her for years. They raved about her and talked on and on about how great she was.

She didn’t want to jump the gun either. We had to pass her standards as parents too. If we hadn’t asked her a lot of questions and asked for and called references she may have turned us down. She is very big on the parents being involved, concerned and communicative. 

We also enjoy the fact that she wants our kids to become comfortable in her house with the other kids. So in the weeks leading up to their first official day we’re dropping them off for half and full day “trial runs”.  So far so good. (And dad gets time to do some projects at home) .

 We’re feeling confident that we found a great fit!

(And I’m not talking about any random Robin Williams  sightings while he’s in town.)  

Sadness. Our home day care provider of 2+ years  is taking a job outside her home. It was a good fit, we had stability and Ben had his buddies he looked forward to seeing each week.

I know I titled this “Mrs. Doubtfire”, but we are actually not looking for a nanny.  We’re just trying to find a good in-home day care and it’s an educational experience.

Our search for a new caregiver is not an easy job.  We  have several factors making our search a challenge. We have 2 kids, only need day care 2 days a week, and we have an infant in the equation.

As I call from provider to provider, I either get laughed at, “Ha! Ha! You’re looking for what!?”, no call back,  or a sincere. “Sorry,  but good luck. ” We’ve found that home providers usually have openings for older kids. Infant spots are in demand and if there is an infant opening, it’s full time only. It’s been a frustrating few weeks.

I’ve looked into the day care centers but I end up being the one laughing (in disbelief) when they matter-of-factly tell me their rates over the phone. Oftentimes more than a mortgage payment and it’s only two. days. a. week. No can do.

I’ve  been using mnchildcare.org as my main resource - it’s very thorough, educational and informative. You can customize your search to your neighborhood and needs. You can also link to a licensing look-up that lets you know if your potential provider has had a negative licensing action against them. Honestly, not a bad idea to do with your current provider from time to time.

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Today we have the ”work or stay at home?” query from ” L. in Woodbury” - she’d love your 2 cents!

I need some help!  My weekend job is in jeopardy. I’ve got to decide if I’m going back to work or if I should continue to stay at home with my toddler.  I enjoy being a stay at home mom–and until recently, I had a sweet deal working just weekends. It allowed me to be home full time–but still have two nickels in my pocket. 

Well, they are streamlining at the job and eliminating my part time position.  Now I’ve got to make a choice:  Either work full time and send my toddler to day care–or stop working all together and stay at home without a pay check coming in.  With the rising price of gas, mounting bills and the cost of Pampers, we depend on my check to pitch in on things around the house.  So if I quit, the checks stop rolling in.  But the upside is I get to continue raising my baby the way I want to. 

On the other hand, if I work full time, put him in day care, I’ll continue to get paid. The downside is with the extremely high cost of GOOD day care centers, I’ll probably net about $30 a day.  I have no family in the Twin Cities, my husband and I are transplants, so there is no option to leave my 19 month old with a trusted relative while I work. 

Any advice? Also, suggestions for good day care in east St. Paul or Woodbury?

Today we have Cribsheet reader (and mother-to-be) Jana with an inquiry on childcare costs in the metro area.

… as an expectant mommy I would really like to see what parents in the Twin Cities are spending today on child care- the differences between home day cares, day care centers, church centers, etc….

I sent her a link to this site

- but realize there are many variables. Please feel free to weigh in on weekly/monthly childcare costs and your comparisons between the different options for daycare that she mentions above.

Sometime last spring, my husband and I were seized by a kind of madness. We polled friends, made numerous site visits and created complicated spreadsheets.

Yes, it was time to choose a preschool for Zoe.

Where does one start? Montessori or The Creative Curriculum? Church basement or free-standing? School lunch or packed lunch? Summer vacation or no summer vacation? Pick-up times, drop-off times, weekly rates, monthly rates…my husband diligently entered all information into a massive spreadsheet.

Not that any of that helped us. When it came down to it, it was what we felt in our gut rather than hard numbers that swayed us. One school seemed too industrial, with its grey brick walls. At another, the kids seemed too wild. The metal cribs where babies napped at another school reminded me of a Romanian orphanage. And then there were the killer high-heeled black boots worn by one principal. I wondered: would she be more concerned about fashion or my child’s wellbeing??

At one point, my husband and I both fell in love with the idea of sending Zoe to Lake Country School. Friends whose kids go/went there spoke of it with the zeal of missionaries. We walked into the gracious red brick building, saw sunlight streaming in tall French windows, sat for a morning’s observation during which the children served us tea (chamomile, darjeeling or green?), watched a video on Maria Montessori and of kids gardening at their summer Land School, and were completely won over.

But wait. Did that mean we would become - gasp - private school people? Were we setting ourselves up for a lifetime of annual fees that rivaled that of a private college? (As one friend put it: You can pay for this every year, then pay for college. Or you can just pay for college.)

We agonized for weeks. We filled out application forms detailing our goals for the nurturing of our child’s brain, body and soul. We even took Zoe to the Lake Country audition. Well, they called it a playdate. A few weeks later, she got an offer in the mail. Our girl got an offer! A sign, of course, that she was on the right path to Harvard.

There were many reasons not to do it - a temporary single-family income, the uncertainty in the newspaper industry (would I still have a job in a few months?) and the fact that Lake Country didn’t take anyone under three and we’d have to find somewhere else for the baby’s daycare. In the end, it was my mother-in-law who brought us down to earth. Now imagine, she said. You’ve got a meeting to rush to. It’s winter. You have to drop Zoe, then take Maya somewhere else. Do you really need the stress?

But it’s My Child’s Education.

It’s Preschool.

It’s Feeding her Brain.

It’s Preschool.

In the end, we decided on another Montessori-based preschool and daycare, closer to home and where the two girls will be in rooms next to each other. It’s a little cheaper too, though not much. Friends have raved about it and we like the teachers.

The girls start this week. The madness has lifted. Until first grade.