Guest post co-COW: Stu the strikebuster
Posted on February 4th, 2008 – 1:20 PMBy Michael Rand
Stu always goes for the humor. He likes the jokes. And now, the stage is his. He shares the Commenter Of the Week honors with Fasolamatt, who will have his guest post up next. See, we hardly have to write anything today! Stu?
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The writer’s strike has caused television networks to scramble for fresh programming, especially in the form of unscripted “reality” shows. I’ve come into possession of a memo detailing some of the new programs heading our way should the strike not get resolved soon. As you’ll see, some of them have a Minnesota connection. Enjoy:
Temptation Clubhouse
Minnesota Twins pitcher Boof Bonser has spent the offseason getting in shape and shedding pounds. Come spring training, though, it’s a whole new ballgame as Boof navigates a series of challenges to his newfound fitness! What does he do when he opens his locker only to find it larded with delicious pudding? Can he complete an obstacle course crafted entirely out of Bloomin’ Onions? Does he avoid the Jacuzzi brimming with Ron Coomer’s homemade ranch dressing? Tune in to find out! Hosted by Leonard Nimoy.
Steal or No Steal
Watch as the general managers of Minnesota’s two other major sports franchises and its hoc-key team attempt to fashion trades and make free-agent signings that are as dicey and baffling as those of Minnesota Timberwolves GM Kevin McHale. In the first episode, Bill Smith sets the pace by trading the best pitcher in baseball for a warm Capri Sun and lint. Hosted by former Cleveland Cavaliers GM Ted Stepien, brought back from the dead via earth and fire magicks.
You Make the Excuse!
Think you can carry water like a professional bobo? Now’s your chance! Watch as average Joes and Janes try to pooh-pooh the terrible personnel decisions and last-minute gag jobs of Minnesota’s favorite teams. Can they come up with classics of their own, like “they’re building for 2010” or “wait ‘til he’s playing with his own players?” You be the judge! Hosted by the dude from Sugar Ray.
4 Responses to "Guest post co-COW: Stu the strikebuster"
I love how the hoc-key team is not in a major sport. Brilliant.
Also, I don’t want to say how I know this but the dude from Sugar Ray goes by the name of Mark McGrath. Unless you are talking about the token black guy in the group that I think was a DJ.
Stu always goes for the humor. He likes the jokes.
Were I capable of 300 words of earnest reflection and sober-minded opinion, I’d bring it. Clearly, though, it’s gonna be fat jokes and poking Marthaler with a stick.
“As long time tv viewers, we’re wondering if Darren Sharper should really be dancing all around in his tv ads celebrating his hopefully last and enormously lucky pick for the Pro Bowl or like that other Darren on “Bewitched” years ago will his head be spinning as the likes of Braylon Edwards, Reggie Wayne and Randy Moss do their magic and go flying by he of the far slower feet ? “
Pok-ing?
(Dammit.)
By the way, +2 for “Hosted by Leonard Nimoy” and +1 for “earth and fire magicks,” for a total of +3. Well done, Stu.
