Monday (Real or Fake?) edition: Wha’ Happened?
Posted on May 5th, 2008 – 9:01 AMBy Michael Rand
It’s time to play a fun little game we like to call “Real or Fake?” Before anyone — looking at you, Joker — gets too excited, please note that we are talking about sports here. The inspiration for this game, and the first item up for reckoning, is the local MLB squad. We have to say we did not see that 5-0 homestand, complete with six-run comeback Sunday, coming. They are now in first place by 1.5 games, admittedly in a division that so far has been far weaker than expected. But the Twins have pitched fairly well — led by the bullpen, which short of a couple meltdowns in Detroit, has been rock solid — and the offense at least showed signs of life with 22 runs in the three games over the weekend. Are Detroit and Cleveland overrated? Can the Twins be a 90-game winner and at least sniff the division title?
*They’re real, and they’re spectacular.
*Still waiting for the other Blackburn to drop.
*Fake like Hollywood.
Many people have penciled in the Vikings as NFC North favorites and possible Super Bowl contenders following a big off-season. Based on everything they’ve done, do you believe the hype?
*Super Bowl contender, homeboy.
*Improving, but still a wild card team at best.
*Riding Tarvaris’ wing is an unanswered prayer.
The Boston Celtics led the NBA with 66 regular-season victories, yet they needed a full seven games to dispatch of Atlanta in the first round of the NBA playoffs. Was that an ill-timed slump that the Celtics survived on the way to eventual playoff glory, or did it reveal deeper flaws?
*A win is a win. They’re still going all the way.
*They can’t compete with the best in the West.
*Their confidence shot, they’ll lose in the second round to Cleveland.
Curveball, soccer lovers: The Minnesota Thunder is 2-1 after defeating Rochester in Sunday’s home opener. The franchise is spending more money this year under new ownership in an attempt to regain a foothold in the local sports marketplace. Yesterday, they won without playing their best match. The Thunder:
*Playoff contenders.
*Playoff pretenders.
And finally, Roger Clemens has issued an apology for the “mistakes” in his personal life. Please do read it for yourself and decide: Real or Fake.
Fasola-link! An interview with one of our least-favorite bands. Matt, how did you know?
21 Responses to "Monday (Real or Fake?) edition: Wha’ Happened?"
Twins: Still waiting for the other Blackburn to drop
Vikings: Improving, but still a wild card team at best… I always cringe when football is brought up here…as P3 seems to inevitably follow.
Celtics: They’re losing to Cleveland in the 2nd round. Garnett could learn something from Bron-Bron about stepping up when it’s needed.
Thunder: Soc-cer?
Roger Clemens: Fake. Summary - “I apologize for the mistakes in my personal life, but I didn’t do any of them”
Twins: Complete Mirage. I’m sticking with my 72 win prediction.
Vikings: Probably finish runner up to the Bears in the division.(I know there was a recent incident on a boat that involved booze but at least it was only one player)
Oh yeah Peter King is all over the Vikings jock.
http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2008/writers/peter_king/05/02/rankings/1.html
Celtics: No team has ever won a Championship after going 7 games in the 1st round. That streak continues.
Thunder: I agree Soc-cer? Did they sign Beckham?
Roger: His wife’s are fake and so are McCready’s, and John Daly’s ex’s, and Beefcake’s wife, and ….
Twins: Blackburn.
Vikings: Super Bowl, homeboy. Why not? Hope is good, and the NFC is wide open.
Celtics: cannot compete with the West, but they’ll still be the team to get there.
Thunder: regain a foothold? They had a foothold? When did this happen? Was it when they retired Eric Perkins’ jersey?
Clemens: he fakes it so real that he’s beyond fake.
Fasolalink: I don’t dislike TMBG, but I’ve never been that enthusiastic about them. “Istanbul Not Constantiople” is pretty okay, though.
Twins: Fake.
Vikings: Wild card. The “Booty” calls will start in week 2.
Celtics: don’t know anything about it.
Thunder: Does Tino Letteri still tie a parrot to the net?
Clemens: He did not have sexual relations with that woman.
They Might be Giants: I believe they write the music for one of my daugher’s shows on Nickelodeon: “Higglytown Heroes”. The theme song is OK. That is all I know about them, which says a lot about my life.
Stu - I believe it was the Swarm that retired Perk’s jersey–not even the Thunder would stoop that low. Gotta keep those 8th tier pro sports teams straight!
All: I don’t know, but things are highly entertaining right now.
The thunder will make the playoffs.
They had a great crowd last night. It is a shame they don’t have any players from Stearns County. That would maybe get some of the randballers on board.
Jon
Things are entertaining and not even a mention of a 4OT hoc-key game? I’m impressed. I bet you didn’t quite make it to the end of that game last night did you?
sr
I hear Stu plays a mean Goalie. And I hear he is available on every 3rd Saturday of the month, when his parol officer lets him leave the county.
Clarence: all we’re listening to right now is “Dog Train” by Blues Traveler, out of the Sandra Boynton book. I love Blues Traveler, but it’s beginning to wear on me.
Twins - real
Vikes - improving
Celtics - lose to Cleveland (Garnett’s throat-slash gesture might have been appropriate in a sweep, but not in a 7-game series against a #8 team)
Soccer - who cares?
Clemens - fake
Mr. Fasola:
Agreed. I enjoy Blues Traveler also, but I can imagine that listening to one of their songs 10 times in a 30-minute drive would start to get old.
Suckitin, suckitin, suckitin,
Like you’re Rin-tin-tin or Anne Boleyn.
Make a desperate move or else you’ll win,
And then begin to see what you do to be,
This MTV is not for free.
It’s so P.C. it’s killing me
So desperately I sing to thee of love,
Oh, but also rage and hate and pain and fear of self,
And I can’t keep these feelings on the shelf,
I tried, but, oh, in fact, I lied,
Could be financial suicide,
But I’ve got too much pride inside,
To hide or slide,
I’ll do as I decide and let it ride until I’ve died,
Only then shall I abide this life,
Of catchy little tunes,
Of hip three minute ditties,
I wanna bust all your balloons,
I want to burn all of your cities to the ground,
I’ve found, I will not mess around,
Unless I play, and hey, I will go on all day,
When I say I have a prayer to pray that’s really all this was,
When I’m feeling stuck and need a buck,
I don’t rely on luck, because the hook brings you back…
All from memory. One of my buddies and I wanted to memorize this in seventh grade…apparently it’s been burned in my brain ever since…
And, now, I’m going to listen to some Blues Traveler. It’s been a long time.
jama - oh, I made it to the end of the game, though I spent from midnight onward rooting for whichever team had the puck, in hopes that the game would just end.
Twins - Blackburns
Vikes - playoffs
Celtics - I wanted them to lose to Atl, so now I want them to lose to the Cavs LeBron.
Soccer - We’re coming….
Clemens - fake
Roughkat in the beer mile - He’s legit. Still undefeated. Too bad none of the RandBallers had the stones to come out and even watch. I even wore my Ocho Cinco jersey.
rk
Sorry I couldn’t make it to the Naked Beer mile. How was the turnout, Randballers not icluded? How many regurgitated their beer?
I like how Clemens’ apology is being referred to as a “Giambi Apology”
Roughkat: Sorry I couldn’t make it out. I did in fact consume much beer that evening though (Surly Bender, and a variety of New Belgium Brews). I know, I know, “it’s not the same”.
“looking at you, Joker”
My work here is obviously done.
To quote Elaine Benes, “Fake, fake, fake, fake, fake.”
* Overachieving is a nice change of pace for a Minnesota sports franchise but I can’t see a better than .500 finish for our beloved Twins. And as bad as Cleveland and especially Detroit have been, it’s going to take more than 81 wins to secure the Central title.
*Purple Pride is alive (we love hard-partying, pasty footballers who can deliver a good quote *read: Jared Allen, Tommy Kramer, Keith Millard, Rick Danmeier*, don’t we?) but are we really drinking the T-Jack Kool-Aid? Last time I checked, quarterbacks win championships and “7″ ain’t there yet.
* The Celtics may slip past LeBron and the Cavs and even the sleep-walking Pistons but their great regular season record against the West is misleading. In a seven-game series, with time to make adjustments, the Celtics and Doc Rivers would be dismantled by the great guards and better coaching in the West.
* Soc-cer. I always loved that one.
* Clemens. The Rocket’s reputation is unsalvageable.
